Day 167 – April 6th

I am absoloutly “cream crackered” and if you don’t know what that means then clearly you have never spent time in London my friend.  I am not sure where all my energy has gone, maybe it is a combination of the double squash on Friday but at Pilates this morning I simply wanted to fall asleep…….later on in the day I did eventually sucumb and was forced to take a power nap. 

I am in a vicious cycle at the moment that I have lost confidence in pretty much all aspects of live, be it squash, dating, work and everything else.  I certainly wasn’t allways this way and around my 2nd year of working for GM had crossed the line of being confident into being down right arrogant.  Upon moving here my confidence took a blow, but it did build back up again….however I would say I have been losing it (confidence) for the last couple years.

I would say this is a classic case of cause an effect, given I no longer believe that I can do things well I am automatically pursing actions that mean I won’t do them well.  In my final year at university I was hypnotised for self confidence and it had a dramatic impact on my life…..I am contemplating doing the same again.

What else has happened today………the Jays beat the Red Sox again and after 6 games now sit at 4-2 a great start considering the teams they have played………met up with Garry for lunch, good value as always although he now has hair that I would have no hope of ever matching in terms of length.  I also went to see the movie Leatherheads……..dissapointing that’s all I can say, dissapointing.

Mood for the day 5 out of 10………..I am beat.